April 19- Pack your heart, you might need it

Daily writing prompt
How do you use social media?

The same way I use carbohydrate-replacement gels- I don’t. I’ll just sit quietly and reflect on how my attitude has evolved during the course of training for an ultramarathon. It goes something like this:

During the moment I click “sign up”– “Man, I can’t wait to run 100km, this is going to be awesome.

Day after signup, while developing a training “plan”– “Man, there are over 700 miles on this list, I can’t wait to taper.

During peak training– “Man, I’m beat, I can’t wait to taper.

While tapering– “Man, tapering sucks, I wish I was running 70 mile weeks again.”

12 hours before the race- “Dear gods of running, please let me slip into an apprehension-induced coma which lasts at least a week.”

I ran three miles today. All the training is in the books. The total distance was 761 miles, beginning back on January 1st. As of this afternoon, I have my racing instructions and race number. Tonight, I need to pack my drop bag with gummy bears and Gatorade, hockey tape and spare socks. I’ll eat some bland, carbohydrate-rich foods, then lay out my racing gear and set an alarm for 4:30am. Finally, I’ll attend to the most pressing matter- gathering all of my preparation, experience, and wisdom and tossing it together with my fear, angst, guilt, and grief. Wadding the pieces into a ball, I’ll stash it somewhere deep within my subconscious. I’ll need the nibble tomorrow.

Pack your heart you might need it.

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